A censored list of things I want to yell at the imbeciles we call customers.

‘Empty your own fucking basket you lazy asswipe.’

‘Stop being so lazy, its 3 steps to put your own basket away!!’

‘I might get paid to be nice to your face, but I will crush your chips/squash your bananas/squash your bread/not ask for your rewards and discount cards/not offer you the promotions/not pack your trolley for you to get my petty revenge unless you stop being a grumpy, sour, old bag.’  

‘I have no fucking idea why your card has declined despite you kindly informing me of it having a ‘$14,000′ limit.’ 

‘Take an extra 5 steps and put your trolley in the trolley bay you useless pig.’

‘No, I am not fucking stupid. I probably have more qualifications than you you condescending retard and no you are not better than me, despite what you think!’ 

Seriously. Why are people so rude and lazy? It is beyond me. If I’m having a bad day, I still have to be nice to you. If I’m feeling like crap or choosing to be lazy, I still have to serve you and put your shit away because you won’t. Why can’t/won’t you? The things that piss me off the most, are the things that would take you all of about 3 joules (?) of energy to burn and hell, you’d probably burn a calorie walking those 3 steps to the basket pile too.